The Email she never sent

Rain pattered gently on the windowpane and drummed ever so softly on the rooftop. The sky was dark and grey; thunder roared and rumbled in the distance, promising a steady downpour for the next few hours.

Next to the window was a vase of long-stemmed red roses. They had been a gift from a colleague the day before. A sweet gesture, to compliment a project well done at work. She made a mental note to change the water in the vase to keep the roses fresh for a few more days. Flowers, she had learned, survived on care, just like love did.

BOOM! The sound made her gasp; her hand automatically flew to her neck. She had been completely in a different world, and the sound brought her back to the present. Taking a few deep breaths to steady herself, she stared at the laptop screen on the table. There, he was standing with his group of colleagues, his smile and the twinkle in his eyes captured forever by the photographer. He seemed so real, as if he was actually looking back and smiling at her. It was a beautiful photograph. She had stumbled upon it online quite by chance…but now it brought back memories in a rush.

30 years ago they had been classmates and friends, she remembered. They used to have heated debates over projects and late-night study sessions. She remembered him lingering in department corridors for her just to tally notes or gossip about his other friends. They had arguments too, but he was always there for her whenever she needed him to be. He was her safe place, her best friend, her partner in crime and everything.

Finally, it was graduation day. He was leaving, going abroad; he had said it casually. It had been his childhood dream to settle abroad. Although there had never been promises of love or being together forever from either of them, suddenly it felt as if he had broken her trust. How could he leave just like that? Still, she managed to be brave and congratulated him and even joked that he would forget about his friends once he made it big. She wouldn’t let him see her cry, not here, not today, she promised herself!

That night, though, alone in her room… she let the tears flow.

3 decades passed like a breeze; somewhere in the distance thunder rolled! She looked at his photograph again; he looked serenely happy (of course! she wanted him to be happy), but he had changed. There were streaks of grey in his hair now and little wrinkles around his eyes, either from squinting or from smiling. He was still charming as always, his features just as beloved, but there was wisdom in them now, and he had an aura about him. She wondered if he was married and had any children. She wondered if he thought about her like she had all these past years.

Underneath the photograph was his email address. Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, itching to send him a message, but what would she say to him after so long? Hey pal, remember me? Do you miss me? That sounded too desperate. No, she couldn’t do that when he had never reached out himself.

Finally, she closed the laptop ever so gently, picked up the vase of roses and changed their water… 'Some things were better left unsaid ’ she decided. The thunder had stopped.